should I?

Everyday I ask myself the same questions
day and night
night and day
seeking for an answer
looking for an appropriate window

there was none
what makes me think there will be?

maybe I just shouldn't
miracles don't happen
dreams don't materialize

shit happens
shut up & live with it

there is nothing worse than the feeling that no one cares whether we exist or not, that no one is interested in what we have to say about life, and that the world can continue turning without our awkward presence. (from The Zahir)

Life is just so fragile
Honestly, I feel like crap

am trying very hard
summoning the courage within
go through the same shit myself every morning
showering myself with hopes and promises
nothing ever get any close

self-doubt deters my courage
esteem suppresses my confidence

I really need a change for the new year
Maybe I should just chill
enjoy my holidays till I come back again next year

that's a thought...
to leave the worrying to the future.