Sunday, April 01, 2007

rainy-sunday-morning post

It’s raining, and I hate rain. It keeps all the good things out of reach, as if the whole world is weeping for you. And when one cries, nobody will take notice, how can one differentiate raindrops and tear drops in the rain anyway?

No, I’m not sad. I’m not happy either. I’m just in the rainy mood.

Woke up this morning and the first thought that came to me wasn’t something pleasant. Yes, I’m blaming the rain. Damn. Sorry.

Eccentricity will drown me one day. I should stop behaving mad.

Dreams are coming back to me again. I do not enjoy any of them. I wish the Haitian does exist in real life, or perhaps a more practical thing to wish for is a dreamcatcher.

There is no Haitian dear, and dreamcatcher is only a fable.

Amazed at my independence… but I’m not proud of it. Haha, it’s tiring, and it can be intimidating at times. I reach a certain extent where I do not know where am I heading anymore, why am I always so headstrong? Second best is not acceptable; mediocre is definitely out of the league.

Don’t get too hard on yourself my dear.

Maybe I am being too demanding. I have to admit that.

Oh by the way I have an interesting philosophy: *wink* which kind of relationship is ideal for you?

A) 1+1=2
In a relationship where there are 2 individuals, with different beliefs, ideologies; most of the time there are contrast in thoughts but somehow they just manage to get along just fine.

B) 0.5+0.5=1
“You complete me”-kind of relationship. A relationship where 2 individuals complement each other, make up for each other's strengths and weaknesses; 2 half circles become 1 full circle analogy.

C) 1+1=1
2 different individuals get together, and become one. Mathematically it doesn’t exist, in reality, it does. It’s rare though.

My ideal relationship is option C) haha. It’s so me… always go for the impossible and put myself in a fix. 2 very different people, despite the differences, they still put up with each other with due respect. As I have told Yen, and Queen… I want someone who can argue and challenge my outrageousness, but making up to each others’ mistakes by the end of the day. Haha okay, I’m not writing here it’s getting really weird already. My point is I’m just being difficult with myself. In case you are wondering what this paranoid girl is babbling haha, don’t waste your grey matter on this silly philosophy of mine. It just came to me, must be the rain.

And I realized the rain has stopped. No wonder my mood is getting cheerier. Haha, lesson learned for the day is don’t meet me on rainy days : ) unless you want to see the storm.

So, piggy is back to her normal self again, only after 2 hours she woke up from her first 8 hours of sleep in a month. Let’s get work starting now. *smiles*

To whom it may concern: Thank you for everything *hugs*. You had me realized what I want for myself and that is the best gift ever. Nothing is certain but you have my word I’ll try to keep whatever we have reached so far.

Love, (^@^)

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