crazed (:

There's something good about hitting rock bottom, everything does not seem too bad once you are at the bottom of the pit. I mean, what can be worse than the worst right? ((: There are only better things to look forward to. In a way, it's good.

I'm a loser. A lousy loser, actually. Letting people trampled over me and being bullied. The most I can be is to be bitchy, haha... seriously Joanne, you have to do better than this. Almost everything seem hilarious to me nowadays, just great, ain't you think so? Like I'm seeing the grandeur of life and what's the whole point of getting so fucked up about misery, disappointments and such. They are all insignificant.

Hope is a waking dream, so someone I forgot who said it once long long ago. Why did I mention about that again? I forgot.

Suddenly my mind is almost blank, think I'll write another day ((: bye bye readers

one last hope

There's still one last hope for this week to turn out to be good. Joanne is ok. She will pick up and move on. Yes she'll try harder next time, and she can do it.

Thanks dears, hugs.

another randomness~

you know what, I realised I have the album of continuum in my music library all these while (:

life's like that. all these while, it has always been there, but one always take so long to notice, or sometimes, never did. people take things for granted. until someone comes along, to show you where it is, then, will you start to notice its existence.

do you know the feeling when you are so angry that you almost want to cry? and the worse part is trying to calm yourself down and thereafter act cool as if nothing had happened and life goes on again.

at a point you feel like you almost want to give the hell up, but there is always this linger of hope that keeps you alive. I guess that is what keeps me till today.

of course I'm ok (: never better. lest not emo anymore. maybe in denial, but if denial is the solution, why not?

loneliness has gone beyond my emotional dictionary, it almost doesn't exist anymore. I will always have my books as my company, books never betray. (: haha.. perhaps it is right to be said that lonely people read a lot, there is where people like me find solace and humor, joy and love.

this is another rather random post. I'm going through some phase of change... can't tell just yet. will disclose when everything has turned out all just fine.

Thank you very much to mummy, family & friends. I love all of you very much.

((:

stop this train (:

I miss being young
I miss home

So much so often I want to stop this train
get off and go home again
but I can't stop this train
would someone stop this train?

Is it true we can renegotiate?

Alright, thanks for the song. (:

p.s. for once I didn't talk about work.

I send my loves to my dearest family and friends. HUGS.

love, piggy (:

nlisuqhwd8ckdlkegfr

ireallyhavenoideawhatiamgoingtoblogabouttodaylifesucksnitsaintgettinanybetter
workwaslikehelluvafullofendlesscrap.livelifetothefullestdomybestselfencourageme
ntsometimesthingsjustcantbeallwhatwehopeforwemakethebestoutofwhatitisgiven
tous.onlythefittestsurviveinthisharshworldbutiamtoostubborntochangetopretendt
oembracethispretentiousshitoflifeitsmeaninglessnseriouslywhatdoonegain?viking
airtechmycompanyhastaughtmemanythingstodayacolleaguetalkedtomeaboutskinc
olordiscriminationifeltsorryforthediscriminatedbutthisistherealworldwherethemin
oritiesarealwaysatthedisadvantagesigh.everymorningitoldmyselfthisisanewdayica
ndoiticanlivethroughitalrightniwillbestrongnfacethetoughworldnibelieveontomybel
iefsniholdontothataslongasicould.youthfadesnothinglastsbutloveneverendsimisshi
mstilliwasreadingmyoldwritingsremindmeofmanythingsbroughtbackmuchmemories
thesearewhaticallpricelessnothingcansubstitutethemnitwillalwaysbewithmeforever
tilthedayidie.

foreverneverido

p.s.iloveyouijustfeltlikerantingmywaythroughtodaynthisisonerarepieceonecanfind!

(:

just an entry...

The background music now is playing O Magnum Mysterium... such calming and peaceful music ((: One can't help but to feel just safe. *big smile*

Joanne is in peace (: sounds like she's dead, nope, not yet, still very much alive, or at least she thinks she is. Perhaps part of her is dying secretly... but who knows, one cannot always be sure about life matters.

Sleep has done her much good ((: or perhaps home sweet home makes her happier, and she wonders... how long can it last, happiness, that is.

Looks like the new year has been treating her well, work has not been too bad, she had had much worse days, life has been rather pleasant, quiet... just the way she likes it.

Landlord is going to raise our rental soon, and she seriously think her current income is insufficient for her to realize her dream. Hearty Tarts is too distant to even to think about it.

Mr Charming has yet to be found, haha, oh well, she has given up searching... what will be will be. Of course she has always wanted to have someone to be there for her, but if there ain't one, no one is it, things can't be forced upon (: it's alright. She has friends, really nice friends and she is more than grateful of them. HUGS.

She thinks of her mother
She thinks of her grandfather
She thinks of people she loves
She said her thanks... for the people in her life ((:

and so this is her mood right now... so un-bitchy-Joanne.

I love you guys (: have a good week ahead! *hugs*

and a happy new year

sorry the wish comes a little late... better late than never. ((:

I took a long time to think about 2007 and the new year 2008.

Thank you my dear family and friends for being there for me all the time, especially my mum and the CBK darlings. Thank you specially for being yourself and not someone else, and Joanne loves you all for who you are. Those memories will be kept forever, and I'm sure the future has more memories to live and store. (: HUGS.

2008... I wish a better year for everyone, a blessed year, with happiness and joy and health and yes, wealth also.

with love, Joanne piggy (: